5. Footballer's Autobiographies
What the piss am I going to learn about life from a 20-year-old uneducated oik who looks like Shrek or an overrated East End "wideboy" who thinks football skill can pass for profundity.
4. NFL Fantasy Football
As someone who is actually playing it this season, I feel that I have permission to say how sad but satisfyingly funny it is that the sports equivalent of being a D & D-er has become more popular than the game itself.
3. The term "Football" when describing the sport played by the NFL
Despite my cries to the contrary, there are still some Americans who insist on calling it football instead of the obviously more appropriate moniker of American Rugby.
2. Formula 1
Wow. It's really exciting this season what with it actually being a TWO-horse race between Schumacher and Alonso and how about Jenson Button and man, aren't Toyota doing well and....it still bores me to the verge of tears.
Let's face it. NASCAR will ALWAYS be the most annoying thing in sport. I hereby reserve this and all future number one spots for the "sport" beloved by all who think that there are TWO syllables in the word man (may-an) and that the Ford F-150 is the very pinnacle and, dare I say it, piece de resistance, of automotive excellence